I don’t know what to think about today. I’m not sure what to do about this uneasy questioning that lingers throughout my mind. Things used to be so simple. Things were so easy between us. I don’t know what changed within you. I don’t know what I did wrong. I don’t know why I never seem to really be good enough or enough for you or anyone, really. I thought this time was different. You seemed different. I felt different. I wish I could let you go. I wish I could learn to let you go. I wish I wanted to let you go. As many times as you fuck me over, As many times you tell me it’s done, I can’t help but hold out some hope. Because I feel like there’s something between us that is different. I guess I just miss you. I miss having someone’s hand to hold. I miss having someone to hold me and tell me it’s going to be okay. I miss looking into your eyes and seeing hope within them. For some reason I can’t help but disbelieve your reasons. I can’t help but wonder if there’s something else, someone else, or you’re just scared. I’ve tried being angry at you- that never happens. I’ve been upset- that lasts the longest. I just don’t really understand. I’m left in a state of questioning.